Letter To Buddy the Dog, Charlie, Addie, Frisky, and Prince

 Dearest Buddy,

I know it's been a few years since you passed over the Rainbow Bridge. You were one of the silliest and sweetest dogs I have ever owned. 

I miss you SO much!!! I know you, Charlie, Addie, Frisky, and Prince were all there to meet Jagger at the Rainbow Bridge. I know that yall are all playing together, having so much fun. I know that when I pass away, whenever that might be, you all will be waiting for me as well.

Charlie and Addie, yall 2 were super sweet as well. Goofy dogs. I miss yall too. 

Oh Frisky!!! You were the first dog that I remember having. I loved you and you loved me. We were the best of friends. You loved sleeping with me and outside my door as well. I miss your fur being EVERYWHERE and on EVERYTHING!!! I miss you being super protective of me and the house.

Oh Prince!!! I wish that I could remember you. The only way FOR me to remember you is thru pictures and stories from Mama. You tolerated me to the best of your ability. I didn't know better when I pulled your ears, etc. You corrected me in the only way you knew how...and no not by biting. 

I cannot wait to see all of you guys and gals again. I know you will be there waiting on me to get there. I know my daddy is there with yall. Playing with yall. Having fun with yall. I can't wait to get back with yall!!!!!

A Letter To Jagger Boy

 Dearest Jagger,

I am beyond sorry for yelling at you in your last days...and every other time that I did. I didn't know just how truly sick you were, and neither did Patrick. 

We loved you SO much. You were our heart dog. You were the sweetest and kindest boy there ever was. We miss you so much. It's not the same without you, Jagger. 

We have your ashes sitting on the mantle and we look everyday. I still cry from time to time. It's been 2 months since you passed. My heart is broken, still. 

You have a new sister. Her name is Sox. We tell her about you all the time. Monte still looks for you some. She misses you. She stopped doing her whining stuff for the longest time after you passed. She just recently started it up again. 

I can't bear to see your nose prints on your window. So I keep the blinds closed more often than not. Sox does like to look out the window from time to time. She is so much like you, but also so different. 

I miss your snuggles at night. Dad misses you snuggling in his lap when he is home. I was terrified to go to bed with just Monte. Especially on nights that Dad worked late. You were my protector. My everything. I wish that we could have had many more years with you, Jagger!!!

We love and miss you, sweet boy!!!!!

Mom and Dad

Friends

 I love THE SIMS. I'm currently playing The Sims 4. 

I had this great friend that I met playing this game. His name is Anders. He unfortunately has passed away due to a heart condition.

I absolutely loved talking to him. He knew about my husband, and I knew about his wife. We were actually talking about me coming to his country so we could meet up. He is from Norway. 

He knew a lot about me, and I knew a lot about him. I still look for him to message me from time to time. I really miss our talks. He was, and is, a great guy. 

Anders, please look out for me. Be that guardian angel that I need. 

My Job

 I work for Panera Bread close to where I live. I started on September 19, 2018. So, almost 4 years now. 

I started out as a delivery driver, making a whopping $8.00 in house, and $5.00 while driving. Plus I got tips. Didn't make THAT much, but it was something.

Then, after begging and pleading to learn production and cash, I finally got moved and started making a bit more money. I still got tips at this point. 

Once my GM quit, I was promoted to Catering Lead/Coordinator. Making a whopping $11/hour, plus catering tips. No more in house tips. I made a lot more at catering thanks to the tips. I was in the position for around 6 months.

I'm finally a manager. This is something that I have been wanting for a long time. I'm finally happy....at times. It is stressful AF being a manager. 

Yeah, yeah. It's just a fast food restaurant...fast casual...whatever you want to call it. You still have to make numbers. You still have to answer to the General Manager on up. You still have to make sure everything goes according to plan. There's a lot of stuff that goes on behind the scenes that people don't see or know about. 

I'm finally where I want to be. Now to really harness my skills and learn all that I can about being a really good manager!!!

To my readers, if you have any kind of encouragement or words of wisdom for me, my comments section is wide open.

I'm Catholic now

Back in April, a little bit before Easter, I converted to the Catholic faith. 

I do know a few things about the faith that not even my husband knows. But converting into the Catholic faith has shown me that it's not a lot like that. 

I still hold my Baptist beliefs as well. You can take the girl out of the Baptist church, but you can't take the Baptist church out of the girl. 

Catholics don't pray TO Mary. They go to her asking for intercession. Basically, they go to Mary and ask her to pray for them. It's like me asking all of you to pray on my behalf. To lift me up in prayer. 

The church that my husband and I attend has made me feel 100% welcome there. Not to mention, I feel completely loved there. 

This church is a small church. But a wonderful church all the same. 

I haven't told my mom yet. I believe wholeheartedly that she will not understand. That she will try and say that I'm in the wrong for making a decision on my own (I'm 33, mind you). Even try and say that my husband FORCED me into becoming Catholic. 

...Well did he??...

No he didn't. He told me that it was my choice and my choice alone. That he would support me in all of it. 

Our priest is a very kind man. I enjoy him.

Also, my husband and I are planning on talking to our priest to get our marriage recognized by the Catholic church. We weren't married in the Catholic church almost 7 years ago. 

Being A Negative Nancy

I don't mean to be a negative Nancy...ever. But it's soooo easy to get into that kind of routine. 

A routine thinking that no matter what you do is good enough. That you aren't good enough for certain things. That you CAN'T do certain things. 

I am good enough.

I do try. 

But how hard do I try?? I try as hard as I can. I want everything to be perfect...and that's what gets me every single time. 

I try so hard in making everything perfect, that I screw things up. If I just try to do my best and not make things perfect (or what I perceive as perfect to my boss/supervisor) then I might just do a lot better. 

Focus on one thing at a time. 

And here I go being a negative Nancy again and being hard on myself. Also, the harder I am on myself, the worse things seem to be.

I also must admit that cleaning is NOT my forte at all. I just can't hang. I can't keep up. I'm also afraid that if I rush, I won't do a good enough job. That I will forget something. 

But it's time to look forward, not backwards. It's time to look for the positives, not the negatives. 

One positive is that I am happy at the moment. Happy that I'm not feeling a lot of stress right now due to work. 

Anywho...if yall, my readers, pray, please pray for me that I can find a new job.

Thanks a million!!!

New job

My new job, from what I have noticed, seem to be a little more on the strict side of things. Which I appreciate more than they know. 

My last job was incredibly lax in how they did things and how they enforced rules and enforced how to clean things. I also feel like I was not taught correctly. You can't teach someone any new skills in less than a day. I'm sorry, but you just can't. So, now I really have to put it into high gear and make sure that I do everything correctly based on the limited training that I do have. 

Argh!!!! 

But I do appreciate the higher standards that this company seems to have. Also this company has been in business for 33 years. So they really have cleaning down to a "T". I should be able to learn how to correctly do things and reset myself vs how I was "taught". 

***I will not be stating the name of this company until I know that I will be staying for the long haul***